It really made me wonder if I’ve been so starved for genuinely stimulating conversation lately or I’m just like that—that no matter what I have in my life I’ll always be greedy for more, always be wanting to see what else is out there.

So I had a gig yesterday. Ended spending almost the entire shift—as much as I could, anyway—talking to this Mexican girl from Acapulco—she was super-rad, talking about neuroscience and studying psychology and teaching… When she mentioned going to school while working weekends I had to make sure I was understanding her correctly—it turns out she’s a junior in high school (though is technically senior-aged) (I had obviously not pegged her as that young). Also after a while she mentioned a novio that is?/did? go to UNAM. So it didn’t matter that her mum seemed to like me. That didn’t stop her from being someone I’d like to know better, yes, platonically. Kept waiting till our shift was about to end so I could act somewhat nonchalant, like, “Oh! by the way, let me get your e-mail address so I can send you those Sam Harris &c. links.” Or give her mine. But I was too nonchalant—I was called to work on another task while the girls who worked there were clocking out; I should have just pounced but really didn't want to seem like a overeager/DOM, and of course I had no idea it would be so difficult to casually mention something as I was saying goodbye. Holy shit it just occurred to me she purposely slipped out so she could avoid that? God, I hope not. She was just really smart + fun to talk to although she’s probably like that with everyone by virtue of being smart + upbeat and also I might have once accidentally sort of flecked spittle conspicuously in her direction while speaking animatedly. Yeah, OK, I guess that could be a dealbreaker. Oh, and also I nicked myself shaving and after the shift when I looked in a mirror I realized I’d had a hardened, blackened blood bubble on the edge of my nostril the whole day. Alright, I know, I’m disqualified. I’ll shut up now.
(Still really secretly hoping I run into her again somehow; pushing away thoughts of “accidentally” running into her again outside of her place of employment, omg too stalkerish.)
Also there was this other girl, who I have no idea if she worked there or with us, who I quickly picked out as the cutest girl in the place and kind of wanted to holler at, she had that je ne sais quoi that said, like, we’d get along, I’m cool, you know? But they assigned her to work a totally different floor and I barely got to say two words to her. Leaving at the end of the day without knowing anything about her + having no sense of whether or not Acapulco would have liked to continue the conversation left me feeling really frustrated and un-centred, still today.

Also planning on going back and finishing my conversation with Target girl, possibly/hopefully continuing it after she gets off work.

I’d forgotten I’d seen someone talk about the concept of cultural immunity—specifically to Western/consumer culture—elsewhere.

Weddings/brides are so fucking sexy